Twenty. Twenty years have come and gone. Twenty years being married to Andy Murry.
August 19, 1995
The price of gasoline was $1.02 per gallon.
The top #5 songs in the USA were….
TLC – Waterfalls
Seal – Kiss From A Rose
Monica – Don’t Take It Personal
The Notorious B.I.G. – One More Chance-Stay With Me
Boyz II Men – Water Runs Dry
Mortal Kombat, Babe, and Waterworld were in the movie theaters. Obviously a bad month.
And….these two kids got married.
The day was hot, and it rained. Then it dried up because it was so dang humid in Southaven, Mississippi. The power went out in the church for a little while as we were getting dressed. I cried because I thought no one would come to our wedding because of the storm. However, people showed up, and we got hitched.
On our 10th anniversary back in August of 2005, we had planned a trip to Jamaica. Well, our flight and trip were delayed for a few days due to Hurricane Katrina. We rode out the storm at home and spent the next couple of days eating all the food out of our refrigerator because there was no power. Memories were made as we took all of our perishables over to Allen and Karen’s house. Ron and Lahoma came over, and we grilled all of our meat and cooked on Karen’s gas stove. Chocolate chip cookies in the iron skillet. Whoop! Then we cooled off in Lisa and CJ’s pool. It was a blast! Then, Andy and I left all our powerless friends behind and flew to a tropical resort for an anniversary trip. Bless their hearts. We were so thankful that power was restored when we returned a week later. We were even more thankful that our refrigerator was not full of spoiled food. Thank you, Lordt!
So, the traditional gift for the 20th anniversary is china. Some choose to have a Chinese themed party with lanterns and fortune cookies. They invite guests to play ping-pong, Mah-jong, and Chinese checkers. Really. Other suggestions on the internet include breaking some china and making a mosaic together out of the broken pieces. Hmmm…. Other couples go so far as to take a trip to China or Chinatown. Well, Andy has been to both of those. We enjoyed Chinatown together a few years back when we went to San Francisco, and we also tried to go to China together when Brett and Lindsay lived there, but a family emergency prevented our travel. Maybe one day. Not really feeling this theme for us this year.
Now, the modern gift for the 20th anniversary is PLATINUM. As in blonde hairdos? Or as in jewelry??? The 20th anniversary gemstone is the EMERALD. I could totally get into a platinum-emerald combo! Some websites even suggested platinum cookware or something that is platinum colored. Hmmmm….nah.
What does 20 years of marriage look like? Well, let’s see… there are a few things that have defined our years together…
We have collected a great number of friends over the years…from Texas, Mississippi, Alabama, Tennessee, and now Kansas/Missouri. How thankful we are for all of these personalities and lives that we have been able to journey with for a little while!
I am so thankful we have friends of all ages. Our lives have been enriched by those younger and those older than us. It is so great to be able to talk to and glean wisdom from those who are further down the road of life. Hopefully, we have also been able to reach a hand back to pull along a few younger friends, too.
We love our friends and their kids. Now, those kids are having kids, and we have a whole new generation to love!
I thought about adding pictures of us with our friends…but there are just too many faces we love. I will have to write another blog post about friends another time. So…here are more pictures of us. Just in case you didn’t know what we looked like. 🙂
We were Memphis/Desoto County, MS kids, and that is where our people are. That area is home. We love those who share our DNA, and both sides of our family have grown over the years. Nieces, nephews, cousins’ kids. More Smiths and Murrys to love. We have lived away from “home” all of our married life, and we are so thankful for those who will board us and feed us and host holiday meals while we are in town. Thankful to the Lord for our sweet families. Some are with Jesus, and we so look forward to a reunion one day.
Andy has had several opportunities to travel overseas on mission trips. Together, we have shared some nice va-cays, too. Jamaica, Chicago, Alaska, San Francisco, Disney World, New Orleans, Savannah, Charleston. I think we have hit many of the high points in the southeastern US. You can’t beat the Alabama/Florida Gulf Coast…just sayin’. Now that we are in Kansas, a list has been generated of day trips and new vacation spots. Now, I am totally down with my SE United States geography. The Midwest- not so much. All of these rectangular states confuse me. I realized shortly after we moved here that Colorado is our next door neighbor….a neighbor that is 8 hours away, but still. So…hopefully, we can go west for our next adventure.
Grief and Sadness
In the 20 years we have been married, we have lost a grandfather, a mother, a brother, aunts, uncles, and cousins between the two of us. We have also lost friends. We have grieved with other friends as they buried parents, siblings, and children. Andy has shared at funerals for teens and young adults. Death is a part of life. It changes us and shapes us. It totally stinks. However, I am so thankful to have been able to walk alongside friends and family when they needed it and will be FOREVER grateful for those who mourned with us when it was our turn. Most of all, we are full of gratitude for the HOPE we have of eternal life through Jesus, knowing that we will be reunited one day with those we love. How do people without FAITH do it??
Sadness has marked our years, as well. Some of our friends’ marriages didn’t last. Children had to experience the pain of divorce. Friends have lost jobs or had to move. Jesus didn’t always fix the broken things, but He surely has been there with us all as we picked up the pieces.
Ministry Together through the Church
Well, Andy is a pastor. Guess that makes me a
passive pastor’s wife. Ha! So, our second home has always been the church-house. We have enjoyed ministering together over the years…to middle school, high school, and college students, their parents, and our friends. Some of our best memories include hosting people in our home and breaking bread together. Our church friends became family. We shared life with its joys and troubles. Forever friendships were started, and our lives were made better. The Church is where we find our people.
I kill the spiders. Andy is a better dishwasher loader than I am. He is also a better clothes sorter than I am. I get up in the middle of the night to see what made that strange noise. Works for us!
Andy and I come from a long line of eaters, and we are not letting them down. Food is one of my love languages, and I try to fill my tank as often as I can. We enjoy new restaurants and new adventures. Coffee-ing/warm beverage-ing, breakfasting, brunching, lunching, and dining with friends and family are some of our favorite things. So, if you wanna try a new restaurant, call us, friends! We are so game.
Built one, moved into a new one, rented one, and now re-doing one. That’s how we roll.
If you are fun, I want to be your friend. I will seek you out and keep hanging around you until you learn to love me. Fun is another of my love language. Andy and I love some fun people. We have had lots of belly laughs with some of you over the years. Thanks! Let’s get together again soon! It’s been too long.
Jesus is Who brought us together, Who has kept us together, and Who will take us on in to the finish line, hopefully.
Well, thanks for taking the time to look at all the pictures of us and visiting the past. Way to hang in there. Andy and I thank so many of you for investing in us over the years through your prayers, words of encouragement, gifts, time, and love. I believe marriages survive because of prayer, God’s word, and His grace. I think they are strengthened by journeying alongside other couples and friends who share your joys and burdens. Thank you for that. We love you more than we can say.
Off to get some Chinese take-out. 🙂
I leave you with these thoughts…